Holiday Homecoming

By Natalie Fraley

“We’ll never get everything done in time,” Meredith complained as she finished wrapping a gift, addressed it, and added it to the growing pile.

In a little over an hour, a group of underprivileged kids would arrive for the community center’s annual holiday bash. There would be food, festive music, games, and plenty of holiday cheer. There were also gifts for all thirty invited kids, individually chosen based on wish-lists provided by parents or guardians. Already, more than a dozen were wrapped and addressed—to each child by name, and of course, all “from Santa”—but there were still plenty left unwrapped, and the party decorations weren’t even up yet. Four people volunteered for the event, but two cancelled last minute, threatening to turn a fun evening into a Christmas disaster. Meredith and her best friend Holly came in hours early to try taking up the slack. As the chair and vice-chair of the center’s community outreach committee, they had a responsibility to make sure this went off no matter what and would do everything in their power to make it happen. They had been working since noon, though, nearly four hours now, and there was still a lot left to do.

“I should have asked Santa for an extra pair of hands,” Meredith said.

“Ask and you shall receive.” Holly smirked in that mysterious way she had. Meredith never knew whether to love or fear that look because she could never guess what Holly had in mind when she used it. It was never anything bad, exactly, but Holly’s idea of a pleasant surprise didn’t always mesh well with other people’s.

“Okay, I’ll bite. What’s that mean?” Meredith glanced at her friend, then put a flourish on the bow of the most recently wrapped gift, affixed a label to it, and set it aside. Her brow furrowed as she looked at the next gift, wracking her brain to figure out how best to wrap up the bright, shiny firetruck that any kid would be proud to call their own.

“You’ll see…” Holly answered cryptically. Her smirk turned into a grin that was practically giddy.

Meredith suppressed a sigh and shook her head. She loved her best friend dearly, but Holly could be a handful. She did like surprises, but this wasn’t at all the time. There was just too much work to do.

Maybe a gift-bag would be the best thing for this truck… Meredith thought, trying to get back to work.

Just then, the sound of the bell over the community center’s front door tinkled once, then again, signaling its opening and closing. A moment passed and then voice called out from the foyer: “Hello? Anyone around?”

“In here!” Holly shouted back, grinning at Meredith like a madwoman.

Something fluttered in Meredith’s belly, sparked by a feeling she recognized but couldn’t quite place. What exactly was going on here? She was frustrated, and a little annoyed. There was just so much to do and if it wasn’t done on time and just right, Christmas would be ruined for a bunch of kids. Holly knew that as well as Meredith, and yet the other woman was still playing one of her little games.

At the same time, though, Meredith couldn’t help being at least a little excited. This feeling she had was complicated, but tantalizingly familiar, and she knew it would bother her until she sorted it out. Maybe it was best to just go with the flow and get it over with. It’s not like Holly would ever tell whoever her surprise was to go away, after all.

The hall door opened. Meredith’s head swiveled in its direction, then her heart stopped. Just for a moment, but long enough to send a pang of bittersweet pain through her. In the doorway stood Ken Cooper, her college boyfriend. She hadn’t seen him in a dozen years, but he hadn’t changed at all. He was tall, topping six feet, and his curly, deep brown hair was slightly tousled, just the way she always saw him in her memories, where he was still a boy of twenty-one. The faintly embarrassed look he wore was boyish, too, and even across the room, his eyes were still the most gorgeous blue. It was like he stepped right out of the past, through the community’s front door, and back into her life.

“Am I in the right place?” Ken asked.

Meredith stood from the wrapping table, the firetruck completely forgotten. “Ken?”

He hesitated a moment, remaining in the doorway as if it was some line he was reluctant to cross. Finally, he said, “Hi, Merry.” It was nickname that only Ken ever called her. She hadn’t heard it in so long… Her heart skipped again and began to flutter like a wild bird trapped in a cage. She swallowed against a suddenly dry throat. How could he still affect her like this after so long?

“Well,” Holly said. “I’ll have to leave you two alone for a while. I gotta go make sure the refreshments are ready.” She hurried towards the door, then paused for just an instant to wink at Meredith before she slipped past Ken and disappeared into the hallway.

“What are you doing here, Ken?” Meredith asked. It came out more bluntly than she intended. There were so many things she wanted to say to this man. Was that really the best way to start a conversation after so long?

Ken fidgeted a little, his eyes sweeping the room, looking at anything but Meredith. Finally, with effort, he looked right at her. Sheepish expression in place, he said, “Mrs. Moulton texted me, said you needed some help.”

Putting aside the matter of why Holly had Ken’s cellphone number—they texted? How long had that been going on?—Meredith said, “That’s not what I mean and you know it.”

Almost twelve years earlier, Ken broke up with her by taking a job across the country after he graduated and he never saying a word about it until the day he left. Meredith was a junior then, and the two of them had been dating steadily from her first semester. They had a lot of fun, and a real bond, the kind of closeness Meredith always dreamed about – or so she thought, until the day Ken practically disappeared.

Before Ken vanished, the two of them had talked about marriage, and about plans for the future she thought they both wanted to build together. Meredith wanted to finish school, complete her degree in art history—a major she regretted within a few years of graduating, but that was neither here nor there—and Ken said he intended to find a job nearby the college to stay in the area, at least until Meredith graduated, too. In fact, he had a couple of good job offers that Meredith knew about in a nearby city. The job across country came as a complete and utter surprise – and not at all a nice one, like those Holly usually sprung on her.

At the thought of Holly a little flash of anger spread through Meredith. She and her friend would be having quite a discussion about this particular surprise. Meredith promised herself that.

“I moved back here last week,” Ken was saying. “I stopped by the community center since we used to hang out here, you know… back in school.” He averted his eyes from Meredith’s, clearly embarrassed again. “That’s when I met Mrs. Moulton – Holly. We chatted, found out we knew a few people in common. A-anyway,” he stumbled over the word. “I told her that if you ever need help for events to let me know. Good way to make friends, you know?” He shrugged. “Anyway, she texted me that you were shorthanded and I came as soon as I could.”

Meredith bit her lip. It was true they needed help. A lot of people were counting on her and Holly fulfilling a promise to a lot of kids who didn’t often have much to look forward to… but why did it have to be him? Holly knew Meredith’s romantic history and she must have recognized Ken’s name when they met. She never even mentioned meeting Ken, much less that he was living in the area again, so she must have been planning something like this all along. She knew that Holly would never do anything to hurt her intentionally, but didn’t her friend realize how this would affect Meredith? Even giving her the benefit of the doubt, this wasn’t the kind of surprise anyone should have sprung on them.

Too many thoughts were churning inside Meredith’s head, but one kept forcing its way to the forefront. There was a party to put on, and whatever the reason Ken was here, she needed his help to make it happen. Above any other concerns, Christmas for the kids came first.

“There are decorations in those boxes,” Meredith said, pointing across the room and trying not to show how much effort it took to ignore who she was speaking to. “The tree’s already up, so if you could do the honors and get it ready, then make this place look festive?”

Looking relieved, Ken answered, “Gladly.” He quirked an uncertain smile. Even now, after all the years and what happened between them, that smile made Meredith’s heart melt.

Focus! she told herself and dove headfirst into the work that remained…

Meredith finished wrapping and addressing the gifts by herself, but knowing that Holly was taking care of the food and drink and that Ken had the decorations in hand, it was no longer as stressful. She allowed herself to enjoy the work, adding little flourishes like fancy bow-work and even some holiday doodles on the address labels. Before long, she was lost in the sheer pleasure of it and was shocked when she realized it was almost five o’clock.

She put the last gift on the pile and looked around the room. Red and green streamers hung from the corners of the room and plastic garlands were strung along the ceiling. The Christmas tree was bedecked in twinkling lights and covered in colored globes. A brightly glowing star sat perched on the top of the tree. Ken stood by the tree, looking as if he was just waiting for her approval. She had to admit that Ken did a wonderful job and gave it gladly. “It’s beautiful,” she told him.

“Thanks,” Ken said, seeming happier, calmer, than he had since arriving. Did her approval mean that much to him?

“All set with the presents? Let’s get them under the tree.”

“Oh! Right, yes,” Meredith said. “The kids’ll be here any minute.” She took an armful of wrapped packages and Ken did the same. Between the two of them, they arranged them in a way that looked like it was right off of a greeting card. It was all so lovely, Meredith wanted to grab her phone for an Insta post, but no sooner did they finish than kids began arriving. As they entered the room and saw the decorations, the tree, and especially the presents, sounds of joy, oohs and aahs, and gleeful laughter erupted. The kids entered singly or in groups of twos and threes, parents and guardians trailing behind them. Each parent, as they spotted Meredith and Ken, took a moment or two to express their gratitude for the invitation while the kids greeted each other and chattered happily.

Within minutes, the party was in full swing. Meredith ducked out of the room to turn on the public address system and pipe Christmas music throughout the entire building while Ken helped Holly bring in the food and drinks and set up the little dining area. Before long, everyone was back together—volunteers, kids, and their parents—and enjoying themselves. There was fun music and good food and season-themed games and, of course, opening gifts. The kids laughed and made merry, compared and shared and bragged about their gifts, each moment pure joy. Their parents enjoyed themselves just as much and more than one sought out Meredith or Holly or Ken to thank them all over again for all their work in putting together the event.

It was hard work getting everything ready, but the kids looked forward to this every year and honestly, Meredith did, too. She loved children and without any of her own, Christmas was sometimes a little lonely. It wasn’t that she believed Christmas was only for kids or anything like that, it was just that kids brought something to Christmas that adults couldn’t – a unique spark that wasn’t something adults could ever really emulate. It wasn’t pure holiday spirit, of course – presents were very exciting, and a little bit of holiday greed is natural when you’re young. But that was part and parcel of Christmas, too, and without it, the holiday just didn’t feel the same. In fact, it not for the annual community center kids’ party, Meredith might have ignored the day entirely. If anyone asked, she wouldn’t have hesitated to say that the party was as much for her own enjoyment as the kids’. And watching the kids now, she couldn’t help smiling. Seeing their happiness was worth going through any effort.

The evening wore on and became night. A few people left, but many stayed and found quieter activities to enjoy, reluctant to let the party end. At one point, Meredith noticed Ken reading The Night Before Christmas to a group of the younger kids. She didn’t know who suggested it or where the book came from, but it didn’t matter. All she cared about was how his eyes practically shined with happiness as he read to the children, enjoying their rapture as he recited the story and showed them the pictures. That was something new, she thought.

When the party finally ended a little while later, the remaining guests gathered their coats and gifts, thanked Meredith, Holly, and Ken, and went out into the chilly night. Holly excused herself to wash dishes, leaving Meredith and Ken alone again.

As she gathered scraps of wrapping paper, Meredith said, “I thought you didn’t like kids.” She tried to keep it casual, just an offhand comment, but she worried that it sounded like an accusation.

Ken stopped sweeping, looked at her for a long moment, maybe considering how Meredith meant it. Finally, he said, “Merry, I’m sorry.”

She was surprised, but it was quickly smothered as anger blazed inside her. “For leaving me with barely a word?” It was out of her mouth before she realized it and now that it was, there was no taking it back. She felt her hands tremble with the pent-up emotions she spent so long trying to ignore, to hide, even from herself. Now that the door was opened, there was no closing it. She clenched her hands tightly, trying not to let how upset she was show. It was such a wonderful night. Did it really have to end like this?

“Merry, I was scared.” There was a tremor in Ken’s voice. Meredith felt her anger and her pain soften just a little. Hearing that tone in Ken’s voice, a piece of her heart went out to him. It didn’t change what he did, but the thought that maybe he’d been suffering, too, maybe make it a little more forgivable.

“You were talking about marriage and kids and…” Ken trailed off. “Merry, I was just a kid myself. We both were. I was scared, and I didn’t know how to tell you that I wasn’t ready for any of that stuff, so I chickened out. I chickened out and I ran.”

Meredith’s eyes burned. A welter of emotions swirled through her: pain, anger, sadness – and even love. She never stopped loving Ken; she was aware of that. She tried for a long time to convince herself otherwise, but she was never successful. Eventually, she just came to live with it, like so many other people do.

“I was devastated,” she said. She turned slightly so that she wouldn’t have to look directly at him.

“I know,” Ken told her. “And I’ve never been sorrier for anything in my life, believe me.” Ken set the broom to lean against the nearest wall, then closed the distance between them. “But even so, I always knew…”

“What?”

“That I couldn’t be with anyone but you.” There was something new in Ken’s voice now, something Meredith recognized, but couldn’t bring herself to believe in. Not quite.

“Why do you think I came back, Merry?”

She looked at him and saw the glimmer of tears in his eyes. They weren’t falling yet, but they were there. Seeing that broke the dam inside her heart. Meredith’s own tears flowed down her cheeks and she felt her nose start running, the way it always did when she let her emotions get to her. She couldn’t help it, though: this was the Christmas gift she could never admit, even to herself, that she wanted. After so many years, maybe Santa finally heard her wish.

Ken moved closer and tentatively, he put his arms around her. She leaned into him, feeling the warmth of his chest against her cheek, breathing in the smell of his cologne. She couldn’t remember the name of it, but it was the same brand he wore in college. Even that was the same. Meredith wrapped her arms around Ken, holding him as tightly as she could, as if afraid to let go, afraid that he might disappear again. It felt like home, and she silently vowed to never let him go ever again.

They stayed that way for a long time, soaking up each other’s warmth, becoming reacquainted with the feel of being in each other’s arms. Finally, Ken whispered, “Maybe I should have put up some mistletoe.”

Meredith pulled back, just enough to look up into his eyes. “Do we really need it?”

He proved they didn’t.

End